Dear Kaeyoua,

You’re right, high school can be a drama, particularly when it comes to maintaining friendships. It is important to remember that we can only control what we do and not the actions of others.

While you can offer feedback to your friends about their behavior, ultimately it is their choice. There is, however, a lot that you can do in terms of how you behave in these situations. While it can be difficult, it is important to be true to yourself. If you don’t approve of what they are doing, make sure that you don’t get caught up in the behavior as well. Let them know that you think they’re behaving badly and that you intend to be both their friends, regardless of how they act towards each other.

If they cannot respect that, then you need to decide if their friendship is worth the effort that it will take to get caught up in the drama that they are choosing to create. We can’t choose how our friends act, but we can choose who our friends are.